“Mom remembers dad, but she also has a new boyfriend.”

Anonymous writes: My mother has been in a memory care center for 2-½ years. She has recently started kissing a fellow resident even though she still recognizes my dad when he comes to visit. Most recently, she has now been found in this other man’s bed twice. My dad and my sister are using humorContinue reading ““Mom remembers dad, but she also has a new boyfriend.””

“Mom remembers dad, but has a new boyfriend.”

Anonymous writes: My mother has been in a memory care center for 2-½ years. She has recently started kissing a fellow resident even though she still recognizes my dad when he comes to visit. Most recently, she has now been found in this other man’s bed twice. My dad and my sister are using humorContinue reading ““Mom remembers dad, but has a new boyfriend.””

An Imaginary Marriage

“Henry! Get your keys, we gotta go!” “I can’t find my keys, Irene! Where did you put them!” “I didn’t put your keys anywhere! Where did you lose them!” They argued like a married couple, but they were not actually married. Jeff and Ellen were two of my residents who believed that they had beenContinue reading “An Imaginary Marriage”

An Empty Couch.

It’s easy to underestimate the amount that people with dementia rely on each other for companionship.  While my residents usually seem to “forget” their new friends after these people die or move away, they do not forget the connection. Often, after a pair of residents is separated by death or by distance, the one left behindContinue reading “An Empty Couch.”

Help! My Loved One Won’t Sleep

I received a great question from a reader, and I think that a lot of people have struggled with the same thing: getting their loved ones with dementia on a normal sleep cycle. Here’s Eva’s question: “My 96-year-old mother-in-law has some form of dementia, and my sister-in-law is her daily caregiver who lives with her.Continue reading “Help! My Loved One Won’t Sleep”

5 Things That Will Change The Future of Dementia Care.

I wrote an article a while back called “16 Things That I Would Want If I Got Dementia.” Then I started thinking, how will dementia caregiving change in the future? How will the world change in 10 years? 20 years? While it is tough to predict the future, I know what my day-to-day needs areContinue reading “5 Things That Will Change The Future of Dementia Care.”

What can biscuits teach us about dementia care?

It is not about the big parties, the birthdays, or the holiday celebrations. In dementia care, it is about the small things. It’s about the moments that most of us forget or take for granted. It’s about taking my residents out for ice cream, baking cookies with them, or putting on some of their favoriteContinue reading “What can biscuits teach us about dementia care?”

Red Roses…for a Blue Lady

“I found my thrill…” I started. “On blueberry hill,” the group answered. It is astounding what the brain can recall, even when that brain is damaged by dementia. My residents love playing “Finish Line Sayings,” which is a game where I read the first part of a lyric or popular saying and they fill inContinue reading “Red Roses…for a Blue Lady”

A Marriage.

A lot of people fear that their spouse or life partner will get dementia. Many people are already coping with it. It’s incredibly hard to watch someone you love struggle with cognitive decline. But what if you both had dementia? Martin* and Joyce* have been married for over fifty years. They both have dementia, butContinue reading “A Marriage.”

The Woman Who Wouldn’t Sit Down.

“She’ll sit down on couches, in a chair, wherever—but I cannot get her to sit down on the toilet!” one of our Resident Assistants, Brittany, sighed in our morning meeting. “Susannah gets really stiff and tries to hold her pants up,” she continued. Susannah is incredibly pleasant, but she is also in a moderately advancedContinue reading “The Woman Who Wouldn’t Sit Down.”

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