22 Questions to ask about assisted living

I am often asked, “What questions do I need to ask before moving my loved one into an assisted living community?” Here is a pretty comprehensive list, but bear in mind, you are going to want to find most of these out through observation! Don’t show up and fire a million questions at the marketing director.Continue reading “22 Questions to ask about assisted living”

The BEST communication tip I have

Here it is, the best dementia care communication tip I have for you. Although I’ve been using it (and tweaking it) for a long time now, I didn’t really “name” it until very recently. Ellen had a problem. “Dad wants to go out walking around the neighborhood, like he used to do…but he’s so confused!Continue reading “The BEST communication tip I have”

“My [insert loved one here] isn’t like these people.”

“She doesn’t need to move to a care community yet.” “He’s not like these people.” “Her memory isn’t that bad.” “He only got lost the one time.” If you’re telling yourself these things, it’s probably time to move your loved one to a care community. Here’s the bottom line: your loved one cannot make a safe decisionContinue reading ““My [insert loved one here] isn’t like these people.””

“I don’t really remember it, but I know it’s there.”

We were playing a “fill in the blank” game. I had gathered six of the residents in the front hallway of the Skilled Nursing Facility, in the hopes that more would join as they walked by. My little trick worked, and soon I had 10 people gathered around, engaging in the game. This fill-in-the-blank book isContinue reading ““I don’t really remember it, but I know it’s there.””

Things we can’t forget

“Please! Does anyone have a copy of today’s paper!” Mattie hollered across the room. “I’d like to read the paper!“ Some of our residents received a newspaper, while others did not. The papers that got delivered came because family members had paid for them, specifically for their loved ones. Of the papers that got delivered,Continue reading “Things we can’t forget”

A Tough Conversation

Usually, when a visitor to our community tries to “correct” one of my residents, I jump in and try to save the conversation. For example, if a resident’s daughter is visiting and says, “No, mom, don’t you remember, dad died years ago!” I will try to swoop in and change the interaction so that no oneContinue reading “A Tough Conversation”

“Dad, do you remember my name?”

Oh, please don’t ask him that, I thought to myself. The old man stood in the doorway, smiling, confused; an uncertain grin, looking at his two sons and daughter-in-law. “Dad, don’t you remember me?” the one son repeated again. “He doesn’t know what year it is,” I whispered under my breath, unsure of who IContinue reading ““Dad, do you remember my name?””

A new way to keep residents safe

The first “bookshelf door” went so well at my dementia care community that I bought another one! This was the first one I ordered off of Amazon (see link here) so I was a little worried that it wouldn’t be as good as the one that local students made for us. I am happy to sayContinue reading “A new way to keep residents safe”

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