You’re probably grieving, but don’t realize it

Are you enjoying my blog posts? Grab a free download of one chapter from my audiobook here and also receive any future helpful tips and posts right to your inbox! *Content warning: this is probably a tear-jerker, just because we’re talking about grief and loss. When I started working in this field, I recognized thatContinue reading “You’re probably grieving, but don’t realize it”

What do I say when mom asks where my dad is?

It’s a question I hear often. I’ve heard it many different ways, from many different people, in many different scenarios, but it’s always the same type of question: “My ____ has passed away, and my loved one with dementia keeps asking about where they are. What do I tell my loved one?” No one wants toContinue reading “What do I say when mom asks where my dad is?”

The always-made bed

Two single beds sat beside one another. One, unmade, sheets uneven, looked as though it had just been slept in. The other, made, simple—a single sheet on it. A black winter cap lay at the head of the bed, untouched for days, maybe months on end. The rest of the room contained women’s clothing. CleanContinue reading “The always-made bed”

A Tough Conversation

Usually, when a visitor to our community tries to “correct” one of my residents, I jump in and try to save the conversation. For example, if a resident’s daughter is visiting and says, “No, mom, don’t you remember, dad died years ago!” I will try to swoop in and change the interaction so that no oneContinue reading “A Tough Conversation”

An Empty Couch.

It’s easy to underestimate the amount that people with dementia rely on each other for companionship.  While my residents usually seem to “forget” their new friends after these people die or move away, they do not forget the connection. Often, after a pair of residents is separated by death or by distance, the one left behindContinue reading “An Empty Couch.”

A Marriage.

A lot of people fear that their spouse or life partner will get dementia. Many people are already coping with it. It’s incredibly hard to watch someone you love struggle with cognitive decline. But what if you both had dementia? Martin* and Joyce* have been married for over fifty years. They both have dementia, butContinue reading “A Marriage.”

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