Stop trying to “convince” them

Are you enjoying my blog posts? Grab a free download of one chapter from my audiobook here and also receive any future helpful tips and posts right to your inbox! Logic and dementia don’t mix. What does that mean? It really means that using logic to “explain yourself” to someone with dementia won’t work outContinue reading “Stop trying to “convince” them”

Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery

“Oh yeah, every time that dad forgets mom is dead, we head to the cemetery so he can see her gravestone.” WHAT. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard some version of this awful story. Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery. Seriously. I cringe every single time someone tells me about their “plan”Continue reading “Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery”

“Can you take me home?”

Verna stood in the hallway, clutching her purse tight to her chest. A blanket was draped over her arm. As soon as she spotted me approaching her, Verna turned. “I need to get home, my mom and dad are waiting for me to eat dinner. Can you take me home?”  Verna was about 90, with brightContinue reading ““Can you take me home?””

Children, Animals, Scary Things: How to handle hallucinations

First, let me say that if your friend with dementia is experiencing hallucinations (seeing or hearing something that isn’t there) they may have another medical issue going on, like a Urinary Tract Infection. However, if their diagnosis is Dementia with Lewy Bodies, or if they have been hallucinating all along, this could be a normalContinue reading “Children, Animals, Scary Things: How to handle hallucinations”

Let them lead, and you follow

Let’s face it: dementia care is hard. Honestly, it’s often harder for caregivers than it is for the people with dementia, especially in later stages of the disease process.  No one “wants to lie” to a loved one with dementia, but that’s why I always tell families to take the word “lying” and throw it out theContinue reading “Let them lead, and you follow”

Dementia gives us gifts, let’s not reject them

It had been six months since I’d seen Dot, my favorite resident. Dot was what I like to call “pleasantly confused.” She was in her mid-90s, had Alzheimer’s, and just enjoyed everything. One thing that I remember about Dot was that she missed her husband a lot. They had been married for decades, and his passingContinue reading “Dementia gives us gifts, let’s not reject them”

Elsie & The Boy Who Wasn’t There

Elsie had been acting strangely for a couple days now. It was our morning meeting, and the team had assembled in the dining room to talk about our residents.  I liked this practice: it gave us a chance to talk about each resident, which made everyone in the community important. Every resident was spoken about,Continue reading “Elsie & The Boy Who Wasn’t There”

“He was at my house.”

If you’ve ever come to one of my talks, you’ve probably heard this story. It’s one of my favorites to tell, because I think it really sums up positive dementia care. Ann greeted me at the door with a big smile on her face. “Guess who was here today!” she exclaimed as I walked in. “IContinue reading ““He was at my house.””

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