How one woman got her husband to agree to attend adult day care

She knew that she’d have a hard time getting her husband, Ben, into adult day care. Ben loved working, and now that he was retired and had dementia, he still liked to find projects to do. Convincing him that he could benefit from adult day care certainly wasn’t going to work (and doing this with […]

HOW TO: 3 tips for keeping them engaged while you get other tasks done

“It sounds bad, but I can’t get anything done with my wife around,” Walter sighed. “She wants to ‘help,’ but I end up having to re-do her task or just stand over her shoulder the whole time, helping her do whatever it is.” I’ve heard this story many, many times over. You want your loved one with […]

Give yourself a break: dementia care takes practice

I’ve had a lot of people over the years say to me, “Wow! Dementia care? You must be really patient!”  This is actually kind of funny to me, because one of the last ways I’d describe myself is “patient.” One of the main reasons I don’t want to work for someone else is because I can’t stand […]

Dementia and English as a Second Language

I’ve had a number of clients and residents over the years lose their ability to speak. Sometimes this happens early in the disease process, and sometimes it happens pretty late. Sometimes it never happens at all. Other times, I’ve had residents who lose their ability to speak…English. What ends up happening, for many people who […]

Alzheimer’s disease is always dementia, but dementia is not always Alzheimer’s disease

If that’s confusing, you’re not alone. Most people do not realize that there’s anything wrong with the sentence, “Alzheimer’s and dementia.” I can’t tell you how often I’ve met people who introduce their dementia care community as, “Welcome to our Alttttheimer’s and dementia unit!” There are 3 things wrong with this sentence:  It’s not a unit, it’s […]

When a relative doesn’t “get it” that a loved one has dementia

Let’s pretend you have four siblings. You and three of your siblings understand that mom has dementia. You get it: you have been changing the way that you speak to her. You’ve been adjusting her care accordingly. You’ve been teaching dad about Embracing Her Reality and how to avoid an argument. You guys have been […]

Understanding the limitations of a person with dementia

A reader of my blog wrote in recently to ask me about a woman who was taking care of her mother. This woman was trying to get her mom with advanced dementia to sit at a table, eat with utensils, hold and pay attention to conversation, and eat regular foods. The reader was frustrated by […]

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